My Heart Is Broken

I am very particular of the people I listen to, the books I read and where I send my tithe. I believe this stems from growing up and being very involved in a church as a child, a church my parents (through discernment) fortunately made the decision to leave prior to learning the pastor was living a lie. This lie ultimately hurt thousands and caused many to turn from the Lord.

That experience as a young girl taught me to be very discerning when it comes to those who preach the gospel. The majority of pastors I listen to, or read books they author, have long since gone home to Heaven and I wouldn’t even need a full hand to count the number of today’s pastors I would say I “follow”.

Yesterday, my sister forwarded me an email from the church I have called home for over a decade. This church has pushed my faith deeper, has forced me into the Word to find answers and to rely on the Lord for everything. The Pastor’s wisdom and insight has, over the many years of listening to him, inspired me to know the Lord more intimately and to stand on the Word regardless of what I see or feel. Although I no longer live in the state where this church resides, I still tithe there and listen to the services as often as I can. Whenever I travel back to the state, I make sure to book a returning ticket late enough to assure my attendance on Sunday morning service.

So, when I opened my messages and saw the below email, to say I was shocked, disheartened, confused or troubled, would be an understatement…I was, and still am, totally and completely heartbroken.

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Our Promised Land Moment

I believe we are stepping into a new season with the Lord. Things we used to get away with will no longer be acceptable. Flippant words we speak without thinking will not be tolerated and saying you follow the Lord will no longer mean you actually know who He is and what He stands for.

I think we have been in a “safe zone” with God.  By this I mean He tolerated so much simply because we, His children, didn’t know better. He tolerated our laziness, our unwillingness to submit to His authority. He tolerated our acceptance of “being a Christian” one day a week, of walking with Him a few hours a month and turning from Him far more than turning towards. He allowed us to make mistakes because we were in an innocent dwelling with Him, a place of learning and growing and finding Him in a world that has abandoned Him.

But, I no longer believe we are in the safe zone anymore. Like the Israelites at the outskirts of their land of milk and honey, we have approached new territory and now is the deciding moment where we either walk into the promised land or continue to wander.

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Freedom Over Fear And Faith Over Doubt

Before I step onto my soapbox, I want to start this post with a couple statistics and thoughts before I begin my “rant”.

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The original U.S. coronavirus death toll prediction was 2.2 million, that number later changed to 240,000 and is now around 70,000. During the 2017-2018 flu season, according to the CDC, an estimated 80,000 people died.  

I am not making light of death in any way. It is terrible so many died from the flu and it is terrible so many have died from the coronavirus, BUT, where was the mass hysteria during the 2017/2018 flu season? Why did politicians and medical experts not blanket the airways with panic, stating the CDC declared the 2017/2018 season as the, “first season to be classified as a high severity across all age groups”?

Why did we react so differently to that health threat then we have to COVID-19?

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I’m now stepping onto my soapbox.

What we are witnessing in today’s society are the masses believing in and acting upon a lie.

Continue reading “Freedom Over Fear And Faith Over Doubt”

There Is Freedom

This time of quarantine has been difficult. I don’t believe there is a person in the world unimpacted by what is happening around the globe right now. Although it seems as if our world has been flipped upside down and our norms are now abnormal, I believe the greatest difficulty many are struggling with is the heaviness that accompanies depression.

The spirit of despair is wreaking havoc on our population. Men, women and children all around the globe are struggling with thoughts of uncertainty, pointlessness, sadness and, worst of all, suicide.

This spirit is a heavy and aggressive one. It creeps into your mind like a silent predator and over time becomes bigger and bigger, often getting to a point where the spirit is greater than the circumstance. Things that once seemed small become monsters in our minds. Issues that were manageable become uncontrollable and daily matters that accompany life are suddenly too heavy to carry.

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God’s Got Us

Over the past several days I’ve been battling the things the devil is so clearly trying to attack humanity with.  

Every time I coughed, he’d whisper, “uh oh, are you getting sick?”

If I sneezed, he’d say, “this is the beginning of the symptoms.”

If I was cold, he’d laugh, “maybe you should stay away from everyone.”

Although I am not fearful of this virus, I’ve been continually declaring healing verses over myself and constantly rebuking the enemy. Frankly, it’s been pretty exhausting.

Yesterday afternoon, I read Psalm 91. Although the entire Psalm is powerful, 9-10 heavily hit my spirit;

“because though hast made the Lord, which is my refuge, even the most High, thy habitation; there shall no evil befall you, neither shall any plague come nigh thy dwelling.”

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Do We Know Who Our God Is?

Throughout the past two weeks, I have found myself becoming ever-increasingly frustrated with the way humanity is handling the coronavirus. My frustration, for days, has been so intense there are times I have to excuse myself from conversations focused on the virus due to my concern of sounding angry towards whoever is obsessing about it.

So, as sat down with the Lord this morning, I asked Him for one thing, “DIRECTION”. I thought He would give me some sort of clarity on what the next step is or how to go about handling this new era of panic and dread, but instead, the Lord showed me where my frustration stemmed from.

We, the body, the believers, the church, do not know who our God is.

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